Tattoo Tuesday: Shoulder

Human beings are not bacteria

Last night we had Thanksgiving dinner with some of our friends. As I sat down to list out my gratitudes, I realized my gratitudes were made up mainly of "I'm thankful Chris could do the work on my car" or "I'm thankful we weren't evicted at that time." All of them seemed to be dependant on something that had gone wrong.

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right? I'm not so sure. Is it really the trials that make you stronger, or were you strong to begin with and without a worthy opponent?

The reason we think trauma may be transformative is that we see variants of this process around us. Bacteria that are not killed entirely by an antibiotic will mutate and become resistant to it. People who go through the hardship of training tend to improve their performance. But human beings are not bacteria, and good training is not a traumatic event. Now it is true that, in an evolutionary sense, those who survive a calamity are by definition the fittest. But it is not the calamity that made them so. For our minds, however, the leap is short between seeing the strong emerge from a calamity and concluding that they are strong because of the calamity.Our brain is a meaning-making machine, designed to sort vast and varied sensory information into coherent, orderly perception, organized primarily in the form of narrative: this happened, which led to that, which ended up so. When two things happen together, we assume they are meaningfully linked, and then we rush to bind them in a quite unholy cause-and-effect matrimony.

Noam Schpancer, Phd
excerpts from published journal
August 2010, Psychology Today

Soooo, psychological research pretty much squashes the school of hard knocks theory and shows that if you are stronger after hardship it is probably despite, not because of the hardship.

Let me welcome to the conversation my belief that God and my determination are the source of that strength. What if I didn't have either?

We all know people that have crossed our paths that don't seem to have that Umph. They just stagger through life, blinking and unable to thrive. Why are they that way?

Yet another multi-tiered, bullet point to file away in my journal under: Predetermination

Yes I'm still talking about Halloween

Seriously though, Halloween was the funnest thing ever! It ended up lasting two weekends. The first weekend was the Adult Scare Fest and the second one was all about Cute Little Dressed Up Family.



Adult Scare Fest

First off, let me just say, Halloween Horror Nights was so not worth the money. The lines were horribly long. Try 2 1/2 hours for one house before we gave up and got out of line. And, there were a ton of really annoying teenagers. Some parts were cool though. Like the time I jumped, screaming, into Chris' arms, leaving my still laced up shoes, on the ground beneath me. Which left me thinking, with a little tweaking HHN could be really awesome next year.



Mary and Chris' checklist for Halloween Horror Nights 2011:

1. Everyone rides together in one car/limo. Hooray for not waiting for the last. car. full. of. people. with. a very. very. slow. overly cautious. (slow) (very slow). woman. driver. at . the. wheel.

2. Getcha' drink on in the limo instead of the park.

3. Get R.I.P passes so we can actually see all of the houses and don't have to wait in line. Hooray for no more beng trapped in line with obnoxious teenagers!



We wrapped up Adult Scare Fest with going to some radio station parties and some nights at home with all the lights off, watching SAW in the dark. I think Chris really enjoyed the clingy, jumpy girlfriend, because he has downloaded all of the SAW movies for us to watch.





Cute Little Dressed Up Family

So much for Buddy being Spiderman and Maddie being Strawberry Shortcake. No one gets to pick costumes when you find 50 cent costumes at the flea market. But, they did ge to choose the little nuances of their costumes, and since we went to a different event each day of the weekend, their outfits were a little different each time. Mostly it depended on what they were willing to wear.

Tattoo Tuesday: Trees

It's the little things

Lately things have been going right. RIGHT! Me! Things are going right for ME!

• I got pulled over for an expired tag, missing headlight (both things I am aware of) and a license plate that isn't assigned to any vehicle (something that I was not aware of)...and guess what? He let me go! I even made it to work on time!
• Daycare was suddenly canceled yesterday, due to some type of virus, but I was already home with sick kids so I didn't have to miss more work or call in unexpectedly.
• This morning I remembered to put my work clothes in the dryer before it was time to walk out the door for work.
  
  

All seemingly small things, but because normally I catch every. friggin. red light in life, I'm aware of the shift in my favor. So, thanks God for the merciful cop, planned out week and helping me to remember things.

Tattoo Tuesday: Piercings

10 things I love

One of my favorite spots in Lakeland.




Hometown favorite and the best beans on earth. Seriously.



My new passion: Canoeing



Tattoos with bold font and design



Yes please.



Chunk. I think she looks like a baby Cameron Diaz





Anna Maria Island. Chris used to live on the island for a couple of years. He brought us out and fed us the best fish and chips on earth. In the process he ruined me for settling for Cocoa or St. Pete beaches ever again. I can't believe it's been here all along. Shhhhhh, don't tell the tourists!



This guy